Mended — Book Review

Several weeks ago I received an invitation from Blythe Daniel to review and launch a book she and her mother had written. To be honest I was a bit hesitant because my own mother and I did not have a good relationship. (To be honest, we didn’t have a relationship.) My hesitancy came because I’ve really wanted to understand and forgive her and  I’ve not been able to do so. Plus, she passed away several years ago and it’s hard to rebuild a relationship with someone who isn’t here. But…

Through reading Mended I’ve come to understand a bit more of the person. This book contained some of the most healing words I’ve ever read. Most importantly, we are only responsible for the words we’ve said and the things we’ve done. We cannot and should not let ourselves think we can fix everything. Nor should we make ourselves totally responsible for the healing that must take place. We can only handle what is ours.

Forgiveness is a huge part of mending any relationship. We can always choose to forgive even if they don’t deserve it. Jesus did!

Verbal, emotional, and sometimes physical abuse was part of daily life for me. I was a hostage in a very controlling situation and truly felt I was the person at fault. It wasn’t until I left home for college and had very limited contact that I was able to put the situation into some sort of focus.  Through these words of Helen McIntosh I was able to reach a level of forgiveness that hadn’t been possible before: When we are the victim and need to forgive someone who has hurt and offended us… They may never even apologize or make amends. They may be deceased or in jail or another place you can’t reach them or oblivious to their offense. But we remain their prisoner until we let the offense go. pp.94 Letting the past go and committing to not dredging it up again has given me a kind of peace that has freed me from the pit of my mother’s words and actions and my own self-condemnation.

For me, this book was worth every word. Did I regress into the bad memories? Sometimes? Did I have moments of clarity when I started to understand? Yes! Can I move on and begin to understand the person behind words and actions? Yes! Can I forgive? I have to! There’s really no other choice.

Thank you, Blythe and Helen, for these incredible words! I highly recommend this book for anyone who wants to rebuild (or build up) any relationship. It’s truly powerful and worth the time.

Consider these Words that are gems of light scattered throughout the book:

It was for freedom that Christ set us free; therefore, keep standing firm and do not be subject again to a yoke of slavery. Galatians 5:1

In repentance and rest you will be saved, in quietness and trust is your strength. Isaiah 30:15

Words kill, words give; they’re either poison or fruit–you choose. Proverbs 18:21 (The Message)

Blessings to you and yours!

Marie

Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from Harvest House Books and Blythe Daniel. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

 

 

 

2 thoughts on “Mended — Book Review

  1. Marie, just yesterday I called my mom, as the anniversary to my father’s death was 7 years ago on Monday. I had made two big batches of homemade chili. I love chili year round. Mom doesn’t cook much anymore; and my younger brother, who lives with momma is crazy about chili. So, I offered up my heart, once again, to do something special for the both of them; and I was shot down. It really is hard having an estranged relationship with both my mom and brother. I also have an estranged relationship with both of my sons, who live on the property next door to her. Instead of being the patriarch of the family, she keeps my own sons, and siblings at a very far distance from me~one would think she would want to help mend these fences, but no. There have been times, especially like last year where I was having horrible health issues, that I went months without even a phone call. sad, very sad. I am touched by your review and will seek out the book. Always searching for answers, I pray, and to tell you the truth, the best message I have rec’vd through the Holy Spirit, is this: Keep sticking your hand in the fire, Pam; and you are going to get burned. There is no better healing than through the Lord, Our Father in Heaven. I say this in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen. hugs, queeny

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    • My heart breaks for you, queeny. I appreciate your transparency. Reading this book was difficult and revealing to me.

      Some relationships are not meant to be. That was certainly the case with my mom. I never gave up trying but there was always such a bitterness about her. I truly believe the adage, hurt people, hurt people. As the years have passed I have begun to understand her a bit better and have come to terms with her issues.

      Keep this in mind, when God is for you, none can stand against you. (Romans 8:31)

      Blessings to you and yours!

      Marie

      Like

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